Coach Cassandra Rae | SimplyFearless.com » life, etc

Video: small moments lead to big results

Cassandra Rae — Thu, 07 Jan 2010 22:48:15 +0000

Time Saving Secret

Free Coaching Call: From Holiday Hell to Harmony!

Cassandra Rae — Sun, 08 Nov 2009 17:34:59 +0000

I am so excited to announce that we have our very first guest coach presenting at this month’s FREE coaching call! I will be both hosting and participating in this call because it is the support I need just days before the Thanksgiving Holiday. Here is your invitation from Kick Ass Coach Vicki Garcia:

For some of us the Holidays can be a time of increased stress. Attempting to balance your business, family time, Holiday events, and still take care of you, can be overwhelming. One of the biggest obstacles to a stress free Holiday is expectation. We all have expectations and they set us up for disappointment and frustration. During this call we will explore some of our expectations around the Holidays, family and our business. We will:

Identify what our expectations are
Become aware of how they may be causing us stress
Learn about intention and how it can help alleviate stress and overwhelm
Practice turning expectations into intentions

If you are ready to enter this Holiday season with fewer expectations and more joy, please join us for this call!

What: Simply Fearless FREE Coaching Call
When: Monday, November 23, 2009 @ 12pm California time
Where: Over the phone {long distance charges may apply}
Hosted by: Coach Cassandra Rae
Guest Coach: Vicki Garcia

About Our Guest Coach
Vicki Garcia is a certified, kick ass coach! She is a wife, mother, corporate refugee, life coach, science geek, coffee fool and lover of all things funny. Vicki uses compassion, humor and authenticity to help her clients be kick-ass, with no apologies! Read more about Vicki at www.mykickasscoach.com

Who does the laundry in your household?

Cassandra Rae — Tue, 27 Oct 2009 02:53:04 +0000

I really do want to know who does the laundry in your household. Seriously.

Traditionally running the household and things like laundry were 100% woman’s work. Well, today us chicks are out there running our own businesses! How many of the men in your life can say the same thing?

So here’s what I want you to do:

Let us know who you live with and who does the laundry in your household by posting it as a comment below
Ask yourself if it is the best, most effective, AND fair way to go.

Here’s my answer:

I live with The Hubs and The Girl (my 16 year old daughter.) We all are responsible for our own laundry. In other words, I only do my wash and no one else’s. The Hubs works full-time, The Girl is a high school student, and me, well I run my own business! I used to do both The Hubs and my laundry. I felt obligated to because I work out of my home office and don’t make as much money as he does. But, ultimately it pissed me off that I was working my ass off and still had to be responsible for his wash. So we changed our agreement. And as far as I know, The Hubs doesn’t mind doing his own laundry. In fact, he just put in a load as I was typing!

Who does the laundry in your household?

Teens & Parents will agree about this

Cassandra Rae — Thu, 22 Oct 2009 02:15:09 +0000

3 Simple Ways for Parents and Teens to Connect

Don’t Let Fear Stop You

Cassandra Rae — Sun, 04 Oct 2009 01:51:13 +0000

Abandonment & Family

Cassandra Rae — Tue, 15 Sep 2009 16:57:23 +0000

On Growing Up

Michelle Ward — Thu, 07 May 2009 18:49:46 +0000

{You can buy this birthday card from kingpopcorn.}

Yes, I am the When I Grow Up Coach, but sometimes I feel like I’m a bit of a fraud. Here I am, a 31 year old woman who thinks of myself as a 15 year old in every way but the engagement & wedding rings on my finger. Yes, I see and acknowledge and feel proud of my accomplishments. Yes, I know all of the many past experiences I’ve had and how much they’ve shaped me, how much I’ve learned, how much I’ve grown, how much there is still left to do & experience & accomplish. But I look around & see some of my friends, both older & younger, & see the homes they own in the suburbs & their kids & their early-to-bed lives & think that I have a looooong way to go to physically & mentally be in that Grown Up place.

Part of me looks at that & states matter-of-factly, “Part of my soul will die if I ever move to the suburbs”, with only the slightest bit of overdramatization. I look at all the trees & the strip malls & the cars that are second homes & I think to myself, “AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!”

And then I come back to the city, to our tiny apartment where a day isn’t over until something has fallen on either Luke’s or my head. Where the computer is literally 3 feet from our bed, & where we have to turn on the TV so as not to hear each other pee – the bathroom is that close to the living room.

I dream of space, and light, and rooms, and stairs, and driveways, and bright blue skies and dark nights with lots of stars and private outdoor space (outdoor space!). But I also dream of walking out of my front door and being at a dozen great restaurants, boutique clothing stores, dance studios and gyms, galleries and theaters and public transportation, and big parks that are calling for picnics and runners.

I realize that these two pictures don’t go together, at least until Luke & I have our first $6 million in the bank and are able to buy whatever we want, wherever we want.

So now my Grown Up Self is saying to Be Responsible, pick the space & the air & the strip malls now that Luke & I are really, seriously, really seriously looking to buy a home this year. We’re not getting any younger, we’re going to have at least 1 rugrat in the next 5 years (it’ll be earlier than that, OK Mom?), & we can’t all live on top of each other.

Meanwhile, my Kid Self is saying, “BOR-ING! I want coffee shops, and nightlife, and a neighborhood that’s moving & shaking & alive & breathing & full of STUFF! TAKE ME THERE NOW!” My Kid Self is a bit of a whiny brat. But I know that I need to listen to her. She’s valid too.

So I guess that’s what growing up is. Redetermining your priorities and what’s going to make you happy now that you’re at a new place in your life. Living in Manhattan, thankfully, doesn’t hold the same weight as it did when I was 26 & would have to be escorted out by men in white coats if I ever had to leave. But it doesn’t have to be Manhattan or Michigan. It’s OK to not want a house in the ‘burbs. Or not want that now, at least. It’s OK to take a deep breath & say, “It’s a priority of ours to have space & not break the bank, but it’s OK to not take that to the extreme. That doesn’t mean we have to go to Idaho or somewhere where half of our current budget would buy us a mansion, while here we’d be lucky to get 900 square feet. It’s OK not to do that. It’s not what we want now.”

Within the last week our dreams and goals and realities have become clearer. And even though The Kid could be a brat sometimes, we don’t have to ask her to leave. We don’t have to do it 10 years from now, either. By then, our priorities might have shifted and it might be a relief to move to a house in the ‘burbs – not a soul-crusher. And if not, it’s OK to make our own rules as to what Growing Up means to The Wards. To our family. To our livelihoods. To our happiness.

Growing Up isn’t a box that you grow into, one that’s been predetermined by the rest of the world ( “Now that you’re married & 31, you must buy real estate & have 2.5 kids & be a great cook & purchase a mini-van & spend time weeding & harumphing over bills”). Growing Up is learning how to make changes that align with your new priorities – ones that seem to be different on a weekly basis, and might not be the same as your neighbor’s or your best friend’s or your Mom’s. And knowing how to acknowledge your needs & that difference & put the wheels in motion to make the choices that will support that.

I guess, in a nutshell, Growing Up is about bravery. And discovery. And change.

Need vs. Want

You’ve Got Talent

Cassandra Rae — Thu, 07 May 2009 18:31:43 +0000

Take Care of You and You Can Do Anything!

Cassandra Rae — Fri, 10 Apr 2009 16:54:24 +0000

Need vs. Want

Jody Yarborough — Sun, 05 Apr 2009 16:35:18 +0000

Need vs. want.” I used to have this phrase written on a small label and taped to the inside flap of my wallet. At the time my motivation was needing to learn how to live on a smaller budget. But I think the theory applies to not over-purchasing no matter what the motivation.

How many times have you, or your family, filled up a shopping cart at Target before even making it half-way through the store? At Target, for example, I could spend hours leisurely strolling the isles for the latest-and-greatest items and the endcaps for their very tempting bargain items. Many things would find their way into my shopping basket. But before going through the check-out I would ask myself a series of questions that would reduce the number of items I would ultimately take home.

Here is the list of questions to go through:

Is this a need or a want?
Can I live without this?
If I buy it today will it enhance my life today?
Do I have one of these, or something similar to it already?
Does someone have one that I may be able to borrow?

At times I would even ask myself why I am shopping in the first place. Am I shopping out of boredom? Depression? Or am I actually accomplishing a chore, one of many tasks on my to-do list of the day?

Shopping didn’t become less fun when I was forced to run my shopping cart through the filter of these questions. It felt good to know I was being responsible about living within my financial limits. The silver lining though, was it reinforced what I really already knew, that…

…living a plentiful life doesn’t mean living with a lot.

That is a hard lesson to grasp in today’s consumer driven culture. We are constantly bombarded with more choices, bigger sales, new discount stores and outlet centers. A message of value is equated with volume. A third of our national economy relies solely on consumer spending.

I have to admit, occasionally I fall off the wagon. I’ll buy something even though it doesn’t pass my need vs. want criteria. I buy it “just because.” And don’t you know, it never works out doing so. Those “just because” items are the shoes in my closet that I never wear, or the sweater that still has the tag on it, or the picture frames that still don’t have pictures in them.

When I do my semi-annual sweep of unused items from my home, someone at Goodwill will have the opportunity to buy a brand-new pair of shoes, a sweater with its original tag, and a picture frame still wrapped in plastic because I forgot I already had three just like it.

Remember need vs. want. It works.