Coach Cassandra Rae | SimplyFearless.com » fear

Loving Yourself Through the Fear

Cassandra Rae — Tue, 26 Oct 2010 15:45:59 +0000

So. Um. Yeah. I’ve kinda been in a funk lately. Okay. I admit it. I have totally been in a funk lately. And for a lot longer than I would care to admit. But, the cool thing is that I can feel myself reaching my way out of it.

I’m loosening up. Letting go. And softening my thinking.

Now I can hear myself say things like…it’s okay to be in a funk. I’m not going to be here forever. There’s gold to be harvested here. I will eventually return to joy, excitement and enthusiasm. It is inevitable!

As part of my journey back to the True Me, I thought it would be fun to sit down and write a letter from my Soul. As it turns out, it is a love note for whenever you are on the brink of greatness but are holding yourself back. It is for those moments when you need a good dose of inspiration, courage, and love as you step into the unknown territory of your dreams come true.

So whenever you feel like crawling back into bed and putting the covers over your head. Don’t. Instead read this letter and choose courage anew…

{click on the image to download and save or print the pdf file}

Video: who are you to do that?

Cassandra Rae — Fri, 13 Aug 2010 15:47:29 +0000

Oh my gosh. I’ve been interviewed by the fab Carmen Torbus, cheerleader for Creative Entrepreneurs and I kinda feel like a rock star! *blush*

And instead of writing my answers to the questions, I video-taped them. How cool is that?! Wanna sneak a peek? Yeah, I thought so.

In this video, I answered the question:

What advice, tips, resources, and overall good-to-know information would you offer someone just starting out with regards to finding passion & inspiration and digging in?

I talk about what to do when you hear that voice of fear that says, “Who are you to do that?” Check it out…

So what’d you think? Please post your comments, insights and ideas. We all benefit when you share.

You can also check out the entire interview where I answer more questions like:

What would you do if you knew you couldn’t fail and fear didn’t exist?

What is your big dream? Yes, the BIG one! The really, super big, pee your pants when you make it happen dream. The one you feel a wee bit nervous saying out loud. Yep, that one!

Be sure to leave us a comment so that we know you stopped by and so that we can click through and check out your awesomeness on your blog or website too. Don’t ya just love connecting on-line?

Rock it out, Peeps!

You are worthy

Cassandra Rae — Sat, 31 Jul 2010 00:06:25 +0000

I just heard Oprah say to Pink, “…that is the true message of all relationships. Is that it’s about learning who you are first so that you can be more intimate with your true self with someone else.”

Pink’s response was, “And I think you learn more about yourself in the context of a relationship.”

Yeah, call me obsessed, but this is the same thing I think about running your own business. The journey isn’t about making money. It’s about learning who you are first so that you can be more intimate with your clients. And you do learn more about yourself in the context of being in relationship with clients.

“A lot of people like to just start over…but you will come to the same problem.”

It’s true. You can decide to leave your business behind. But, you are still left with you. So why not stick it out? Look at yourself full on. Take it in. Love all parts…good, bad, strong, weak…and just know that no matter what happens on your income statement you are worthy.

You are worthy.

Building a business has been one of the most heart-wrenching and heart-fulfilling experiences I’ve ever been through. I’ve learned more about who I am and what’s important to me. It’s almost impossible to run from your “stuff” when you are developing your business because your stuff shows up on your income statement.

Believe me, what you think you are worth will show up. And in order to grow, you must look at it square in the eyes. You must look at you square in the eyes. And nothing is more terrifying than facing your own belief about what you are worth or not worth.

The Path of Your Calling is Easy!

Cassandra Rae — Mon, 14 Jun 2010 15:06:06 +0000

I am in love with the Law of Attraction! Currently, I’m reading The Vortex: Where the Law of Attraction Assembles All Cooperative Relationships and on page 131 Abraham says:

“And, most important, that expanded version of you is calling you; and if you will listen, a well-lighted and easy-to-navigate path will appear before you.”

I *LOVE* this perspective and I am dedicated to its truth. You see, I don’t necessarily believe it yet. A part of me insists that living into my dream self and life is hard. That pesky little voice of fear says, “I mean, come on, that’s how it’s been in the past; that’s just how life is; and why would it be any different for you in the future? You think you’re special or something?”

Yeah, well I’m not going to give fear power over me. I say YES! I do think I’m something special. And I believe that by believing a well-lighted and easy-to navigate path will appear before me. In fact, I believe that everyone is special and everyone has the power to believe in their well-lighted and easy-to-navigate path. Why the heck not? We all have a choice about how we view life. So why not choose the beliefs that you really want to be true? I know that by intentionally practicing this belief one day I will wake up and realize that I’m on my well-lighted and easy-to-navigate path. Woohoo!

Oh I’m so curious…how do you feel about this quote? Do tell.

Video: letting go of the fear one inch at a time

Cassandra Rae — Sat, 05 Jun 2010 00:00:20 +0000

Of course my birthday celebration wouldn’t be complete without a little fear and a whole lot of courage! Check out this video where I share all about my experience zip-lining and cave repelling. What was I thinking?!

»Today is Simply Fearless Friday! Let’s face our fears and grow our courage together. Publish your Simply Fearless story on your blog, leave a direct link in a comment below, and I’ll pop on over and leave you some comment love. Don’t ya just love comments on your blog?! «

Simply Fearless Friday: make the world a friendlier place

Cassandra Rae — Fri, 14 May 2010 16:55:51 +0000

»Today is Simply Fearless Friday! Publish your Simply Fearless story on your blog, leave a direct link in a comment below, and I’ll pop on over and leave you some comment love. Let’s face our fears and grow our courage together!«

I had 45 minutes until my next appointment and I was feeling uninspired at the computer so I decided to go for a photo walk. I grabbed my camera and got in the care. Where should I go? I don’t know, but not far because I only have 30 minutes.

Why don’t I just cross the tracks and walk through that neighborhood of houses?

I could. But, people might think I’m weird for taking photos of their front yards. I like to go to more public places like downtown.

Wait a minute. Am I really going to let fear stop me?

No.

Well maybe.

Okay. If traffic is clear, then I will turn left at the next street, pull over, park in the nearest side yard, and go on my photo walk in this neighborhood.

Traffic is clear. Darn! Okay here I go…

I parked on a very familiar corner. I used to jog in this neighborhood and there are some gorgeous orange flowers across the street with tiger stripes. What a perfect place to start:

I kept walking and could see these huge purpley-blue flowers coming up on the left. Oh no! The owner of the house they belong to is outside talking to a neighbor. Drats. Oh I don’t care. He used to say hi to me every time he saw me jogging by and these flowers are too gorgeous to pass up.

I began taking photos regardless of any potential criticism and then the neighbors were done talking. Crap.

“They’re gorgeous, aren’t they?” he asked while walking over.

I looked up from my camera, “Yes, they are. I have no idea how to care for flowers, but I do love to photo them!”

“They’ve never grown this big and strong before. We used to just have a few little ones each season, but then she was in the hospital and I took over. I water them every other day and they’re doing so well.”

I could tell this man poured more than water on these flowers. He poured his heart into them causing them to blossom and I wondered if she was still in the hospital.

“Hey, if you like to photo flowers, then you’ve gotta see this one in the backyard.” He turned and began walking towards the open gate.

“Okay!” I didn’t even think twice about going into the backyard of a stranger. I simply knew it was safe and I was excited to see the flower. It must be gorgeous if he thinks it’s prettier than the ones out front.

We chatted while I snapped photos and I found out that she transitioned in March. No wonder this man is loving on his flowers so much.

His wife of 38 years (that’s older than me!) was no longer with him physically. I can’t even imagine how to start over after that. But, I do know that neighbors who take photos, who stop and talk, who aren’t afraid to care can help tremendously in the healing process.

I’m so glad that I didn’t allow fear to stop me and that I courageously connected with a new friend. Ralph asked me to print out one of the photos of the big red flower for him and I wonder if it was from her memorial service.

You know, this experience felt like a blast from the past when people who didn’t know each other weren’t afraid to talk to each other. People trusted one another simply because they were neighbors. That is the world I live in. That is the world I am helping to create because community is one of the keys to happiness.

Everyone benefits when you share:
What is one simple thing you can do to make your neighborhood more friendly?

Fear can no longer stop me from sharing my message!

Cassandra Rae — Fri, 07 May 2010 15:24:23 +0000

{Today is Simply Fearless Friday and I am so excited to feature guest blogger Nailah Blades. She is inspiring me to put myself and my message out there regardless of what anyone else says or does. Woohoo!}

My fearless moment came when I decided to look my fear of public speaking square in the eye and say “no more!” Now don’t get me wrong, I’m not shy. I’m definitely what one would classify as a “Chatty Cathy.” I could talk to anyone about seemingly anything for hours on end. Entertain a small group of people? No sweat! But the idea of standing up on a stage and delivering my message to a room full of onlookers left me both terrified and exhilarated – mostly terrified. I was scared I would not have anything interesting to say or that I’d fumble through my speech or – worst of all – people would judge me. All of this kept me from taking the plunge and going after speaking gigs.

I knew that ultimately speaking was where I wanted to go. I’m passionate about reaching out to others and inspiring them to live bold & stimulating lives. I knew that my message is an important one and I didn’t want my uneasiness with public speaking to stand in my way. It was time to take action and stop letting fear dictate my path.

Signing up for Toastmasters was a huge step for me. I had to get over my fear of being judged by strangers and I also had to admit that it was ok to ask for help in something. I noticed my confidence building with each speech I delivered. Thinking of content for new speeches made me incredibly excited. I couldn’t believe I had wasted so much time being nervous about speaking.

Being fearless allowed me to identify what was holding me back and figure out a way to nip it in a bud. If I’d decided to stay in my comfort zone I would never have realized how much I actually enjoy speaking. But even worse than that, I would have been depriving the world of my unique message and my unique energy. Being fearless can be terrifying and difficult, but we owe it to ourselves and to everyone around us to take bold, vibrant, fearless steps each and every day.

Nailah Blades

Nailah Blades is a Los Angeles based life purpose and career coach who specializes in the quarter life experience. After waking up one day face to face with her own quarter life crisis, Nailah became determined to help other women unlock their true passions so they may begin living insanely fulfilling and authentically happy lives. Nailah earned her B.A in Communications & Sociology from the University of Southern California and was certified through The Life Purpose Institute. When Nailah isn’t coaching or writing she enjoys reading, wine-tasting and bad reality TV. You can join her free weekly newsletter for advice, tips and inspiration through her website: www.PolkaDotCoaching.com, read her blog: www.PolkaDotCoaching.com/blog or follow her on Twitter: @PolkaDotCoach.

Everyone benefits when you share:
What bold, vibrant and fearless step are you ready to take?

I am quirky & proud of it!

Cassandra Rae — Fri, 30 Apr 2010 16:33:47 +0000

This week I reconnected with my quirkiness! I was reminded how happy it makes me feel to be my quirky self. I’m not talking about doing wild, crazy, and weird things. I’m talking about having permission to be myself without filtering.

How often do you draft a blog post, website copy, or even an email and you start out writing what you mean and then you edit, edit, edit because you’re afraid of how it might sound or how it will be received? We edit ourselves out all the time in what we say, what we write, and what we do. Even in what we wear!

So this week I’ve been writing it, saying it, and doing it before thinking myself out of it and this morning at the coffee shop I saw this beautifully quirky young girl with a crazy wig on. As soon as I saw her I wanted to take her picture and blog about her. I paused for a moment and realized that I had a choice to make:

I could follow my quirky self and go ask
a complete stranger for a photo

I could listen to the voice of fear that said,
“Don’t do that. That’s stupid. You can’t talk
to a perfect stranger.”

Obviously I followed my quirky self and it felt so good! Luna was happy to have her photo taken and I found out that she made the wig herself for Crazy Hair Day at school. How fun is that?!

I know in my heart that my success is in my quirkiness. Now it’s just a matter of allowing my quirky self more room to play, to laugh, to imagine, to express, and to be quirky. Wahoo!

{Random story about me: one of the very first things that attracted me to my husband is that when we first met he told me I was quirky. I loved that he could see it in me, that he was bold enough to tell me, and it was obvious he liked me for it and not in spite of it. Aw…quirky can be romantic too :~}

Everyone benefits when you share:
What do you need to give yourself permission to be in order to receive the success you desire?

Your Heart Knows the Way

Cassandra Rae — Fri, 23 Apr 2010 23:56:17 +0000

Earlier this week I began writing this blog post…

I really do want to blog about my trip to the Abraham-Hicks workshop. And yet, I’m finding there isn’t anything I am burning to blog about. In fact, I think I’ve returned from my trip less enthusiastic about the Law of Attraction then before I went. Oh wow! I didn’t realize that until I typed it out just now. No wonder I’m not feeling inspired.

The weird thing is…I still believe in the message and I still want to keep learning and growing in it. In fact, I want to be enthusiastic about it. It’s even more than that. I want to say only positive and pretty things about it and my experience because I want to share with you the power of the message.

Photos from my trip

But, the truth is…it’s not all positive and pretty. In fact, I think a big part of my less-than-enthusiastic attitude right now is because on my way back from the conference I received a message from a Facebook friend warning me that Abraham-Hicks is a scam. I know this person is looking out for my best interest…and it still knocked me out of balance.

Actually I’m surprised at how easy it was for me to pull back. It’s like I was on this journey of opening and expanding awareness and then one email later my head & heart slam shut. Ouch!

At the time, I didn’t know how to end the blog post so instead of publishing it I saved it for later when I wasn’t so entrenched in it. Now that it’s been a few days and I’m in a completely different place. In fact, I’m so grateful for receiving that email warning. Why? Because it showed me what it’s like for me when I get knocked out of my heart and into my head.

You see, through this experience I’ve learned that there are two types of knowing: one in your mind and one in your heart. These two knowings don’t always match up. Right now I’m in a space of my mind catching up to my heart. There are moments when I’m confused, but here’s what I do know…

When I read Abraham’s message it speaks directly to my heart. I feel how it aligns with my Soul. I know in my heart that it’s right for me. I don’t need any proof to believe and I don’t feel the need to prove my belief to anyone else.

Yeah, there are also times when my mind just doesn’t get it. When I feel this strong desire to justify, prove, and defend my process. When I wonder if I’m on the “wrong” path.

But, all of this – the entire process – is all about showing me when I’m in alignment with my Calling, my Soul, and my path. I get to feel my way through it. In retrospect, I see why that email warning felt so yucky. It wasn’t aligned with my knowing.

This morning I went to the coffee shop with The Vortex and read for 45 minutes. I reconnected with Abraham’s message and my own heart knowing. Now I feel impervious to the email warning I received. I see it as the way my Facebook friend honored where she was at in her process – she needed to warn me to stay in alignment with her path. And at the end of the day, it honored me too because now I know more about where I’m at and where I’m headed. It probably isn’t where she wants me to go, but that’s okay.

This is my journey and my heart knows the way.

Everyone benefits when you share:
What does your heart know?

–

Today is Simply Fearless Friday! Publish your Simply Fearless story on your blog, leave a direct link in a comment below, and I’ll pop on over and leave you some comment love. Let’s face our fears and grow our courage together!

3 Simple Ways to Feel Better Now

Cassandra Rae — Fri, 16 Apr 2010 16:12:20 +0000

Lately I’ve been waking up in the morning without the same zest for life that I usually have. It’s very curious. Something is missing and I don’t know what it is.

Here’s what I do know. I know that the lack of happiness means that I’m not fully aligned with my Soul. You see, my Soul has everything I want and it’s my job to align with my Soul so that I can receive my desires. Yeah, easier said than done. But, it’s well worth every ounce of effort because when I am aligned with my Soul that’s when I am in flow with life. That’s when I am joyously present. That’s when people and opportunities show up in perfect timing. That’s when I am in sync with my creative juices. And that’s where I want to be.

Photography soothes my Soul

So today, right now, I wrap myself in loving compassion understanding that this empty feeling is only temporary and that at its core it is a gift to me. How else would I know I’m out of alignment?

I also give myself permission to make taking care of me my top priority today. Yes, I have a ginormous list of things I’d like to accomplish. But, if I plow my way through my to-do list while ignoring how I feel, I know that I will (1) drain my energy, and (2) not receive the results I want. Plus, giving a little to myself now always leads to having more later.

Does all of this freak me out? Heck yes! But, I already feel a little bit better just by writing about it and sharing it with you. Now before I move into the rest of my day, I’m going to invest in 10 minutes of silence. I’m simply going to sit, relax, and open up to receive any guidance from my Soul.

Everyone benefits when you share:
What do you do when you feel empty?

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Today is Simply Fearless Friday! What simple act of courage have you taken this week? Share your Simply Fearless Friday story on your blog. Then come back here and leave a link directly to your blog post so that we can go check it out. Let’s face our fears and grow our courage together! If you participate, then I promise to leave a comment on your Simply Fearless Friday blog posts and you know how cool comments are :~)